The Hall family has not done well with pets historically. Our first pet, a Beta fish, was accidentally left outside in the cold, bowl and all. The second Beta fish died of starvation in a dark room. One of our cats thought the whole house was a litter box, so she is no longer with us. The other cat was given away because of allergy issues in the family.
So, the kids now want a dog. Do we dare? It is self-evident that a gift wrapped dog is THE perfect Christmas present. The video footage of that moment alone brings one to the brink of saying "Yes" to Rover. There is no question that the dog will be loved. But will the dog be loved more than he will be loathed...that is the math problem parents try to solve within themselves before Rover comes over. How do we determine the love-loathe ratio?
Well, first we look at those people who love their dog. They read books about their dog, research a proper diet, set-up a social network, schedule playdates and purchase custom clothing...all for the dog. These people make dog ownership look like having another child.
Then, we look at those who loathe their dogs. They will say it is the dog's fault. We don't even know the real name of their dog, because all we hear is the nicknames. The rap sheet on these dogs is indeed extensive...chewed a couch, swallowed a sock, woke the neighbors, ran away again, glee-peed on the company, ran in front of the lawnmower, snacked on own feces...etc, etc. Makes it less appealing.
We then draw upon our childhood memories of our own dogs. Running, laughing walking with the dog, pictures and videos with the pooch. Nothing but happy memories! Yet, we are playing the part of the parents now...so we have to factor in how our parents felt about our dogs, and the scales begin to tip again. Trips to the vet, late night bathroom breaks, vacation boarding, bath time...etc.
There is a financial component to the decision. We were offered a free min-pin. Slang for "mini pincher." Looks like a squirrel that managed to swallow a doberman. Free dogs are free for a reason, I guess. Do we pick a big dog, an active dog, a lap dog, a tough dog, a sissy dog, an ugly dog, a shedder, a drooler, a jumper, a barker, loyal, fearful, fluffy or obedient? Such a paralyzing decision.
So, for now, we have decided to purchase a dog that lives in the TV, thanks to Nintendo technology. We are buying a video game called Dogs. The kids can choose a dog, dress a dog, walk a dog, feed a dog...but it stays inside the television. But how long will that hold them over?
